TTC: Getting through the 2ww…
The 2 weeks that you must wait from after either your embryo transfer or IUI until you find out you are pregnant, also known as the 2ww, are nothing less than torture. The entire time you are consumed with analyzing every single little twinge, flicker, feeling and sensation in your body. You spend hours googling what are early pregnancy signs, how soon can you test, and wondering did this work or didn’t it. To add to this, if you are using PIO you feel like a human pincushion and for those of us who hate needles, you must work up the nerve daily to give yourself a shot or have a trusted person in your life give it to you. It is NOT what you thought the process for getting pregnant would look or feel like. But here you are, waiting and wondering and looking for ways to get through this time. While I can’t speed up the wait until your beta, I’ve got a few suggestions of what you can do for yourself over these next 2 weeks until that result comes in.
One of the things that makes infertility treatment so difficult is wanting something so much and feeling like you have very little control over getting what you want. So, what can help is trying to find ways to increase your sense of control. The best way we can do this is focusing on your self-care and maximizing ways to take care of your mind and body. Here are some ideas:
Meditation
Meditation is a simple but effective way to reduce stress, increase calm and help you feel more present. When we feel anxious or overwhelmed it’s very common to spiral forward into “what ifs.” When we do this, we are looking into the future where there are lots of unknowns. Meditation can help bring us back to where we are right now in the present. There are some infertility treatment specific meditations you can use like Circle + Bloom or more general apps like Insight Timer, Calm and Headspace. Initially you may have difficulty staying focused or getting distracted easily. That’s ok. This is very common when you first start meditation. Know that staying with it and doing it on a regular basis, even if you are zoning out from time to time, will have positive benefits.
Comfort
Unfortunately, there is a lot of discomfort when going through infertility treatment from blood draws, ultrasounds, injections, and uncomfortable or painful testing. While all of these are necessities for treatment, let’s try to balance that out with bringing as much comfort into your life as you can right now. This might mean different things to different people. For some it’s pulling out cozy, soft socks and a warm blanket. For others it’s curling up with your pet or drinking some hot tea. You can also bring comfort to your environment like going outside each day and feeling the sun on your face, lighting candles, or using a diffuser for essential oils. Whatever it is for you, this is the time to make a list of what helps you feel comfortable and do that daily for the next two weeks.
Distraction
Now is the time to keep busy and try your best to occupy yourself with other things to think about or do. And even better if these distractions bring you joy or laughter. Some suggestions are rereading a favorite book or watching a favorite movie or tv show. It can be spending time preparing your favorite meals, especially if you love to cook. You can pick a mindless project that you’ve been meaning to do like reorganizing your closets, which will provide not only distraction but a nice sense of accomplishment. Try to keep it simple and something with a high likelihood of success or proven effectiveness where you know it’s something that has worked in the past.
Support and Connection
You want to surround yourself during this time with others who bring you comfort, distraction and support. These are the people who say the right things, who know how to hold space for you and what you’re going through and treat you with kindness, love, and care. If you find that there are those in your circle who are well-meaning but don’t always hit the mark with actions or words, these two weeks are not the time to spend with them. Do yourself the favor of carefully choosing to connect with those who do not cause stress and or emotional pain. You know who all these people are-trust and go with your gut on this. It can also help immensely to connect with others who are going through infertility treatment. Ask at your fertility clinic if they have a group or go to Resolve to find an online group.
Finally, try not to do any pregnancy tests. It’s likely you’d be testing too early and then could be unnecessarily disappointed and/or worried that you aren’t pregnant. Wait until that beta with your clinic so you can get more reliable results. And for that day when you finally get your results, plan if possible, a light, low key day where you keep busy but nothing that requires high concentration or focus. I know it’s so hard to wait…wishing for you the result you’ve been dreaming of.